Chris, one of the shift supervisors at my store, the one who trained me, is leaving. Tuesday is his last day. Although I've never told him this, (even though he probably knows) he's as close to a best friend as anyone else I have in my life. I'm an only child, and he is as close to me as any brother would be. Right up there with my Lady Love, who incidentally, shot me down today for the third time, in the kindest way possible. She's going through her own near-breakdown at the moment. Our schedules never match up so I never get to see her outside of work, and when I do see her, it's always on the rare times that we work together, surrounded by people. I'm watching her collapse as silently as anyone can collapse, and there is nothing I can do to help her.
I've realized finally that she does know how I feel about her. Mostly, because she's told me (in not so many words) that she doesn't want the same things I want.
Right now though, I'm obsessing over Chris. To be honest, I love them both, and I tend to go back and forth between whoever's taking up the most space in my mind at any one time. At the moment it's him, only because he's leaving me -______-
Chris and I both requested to be scheduled together for the bulk of his last shift. And our manager gave me off. HE GAVE ME OFF. ON CHRIS'S LAST DAY. I COULD MURDER HIM.
I've been in denial about his leaving. Every time someone mentions it, I get a pain in my stomach and my insides cringe. I know it's dramatic. But I'm dramatic.
I don't want him to leave me

I'm having a rough week.